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  | 
 Time Sheets  
TO:
 ALL PERSONNEL 
FROM:  ACCOUNTING 
 
It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in
timesheets that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive
Time" (Code 5309). However, we need to know exactly what you are doing
during your unproductive time. 
 
Attached below is a sheet specifying a tentative extended job code list based on
our observations of employee activities. 
 
The list will allow you to specify with a fair amount of precision what you are
doing during your unproductive time. Please begin using this job-code list
immediately and let us know about any difficulties you encounter. 
 
Thank you, 
Accounting 
 
Attached: Extended Job-Code List
 
Code
and Explanation 
5316 Useless Meeting 
5317 Obstructing Communications at Meeting 
5318 Trying to Sound Knowledgeable While in Meeting 
5319 Waiting for Break 
5320 Waiting for Lunch 
5321 Waiting for End of Day 
5322 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at Coworker 
5323 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at Coworker While Coworker is Not Present 
5393 Covering for Incompetence of Coworker Friend 
5400 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who is Not Interested in Learning 
5401 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who is Stupid 
5402 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who Hates You 
5481 Buying Snack 
5482 Eating Snack 
5500 Filling Out Timesheet 
5501 Inventing Timesheet Entries 
5502 Waiting for Something to Happen 
5503 Scratching Yourself 
5504 Sleeping 
5510 Feeling Bored 
5511 [CENSORED] 
5600 Complaining About Lousy Job 
5601 Complaining About Low Pay 
5602 Complaining About Long Hours 
5603 Complaining About Coworker (See Codes #5322 & #5323) 
5604 Complaining About Boss 
5605 Complaining About Personal Problems 
5640 Miscellaneous Unproductive Complaining 
5701 Not Actually Present At Job 
5702 Suffering From Eight-Hour Flu 
6102 Ordering Out 
6103 Waiting for Food Delivery to Arrive 
6104 Taking It Easy While Digesting Food 
6200 Using Company Resources for Personal Profit 
6201 Stealing Company Goods 
6202 Making Excuses After Accidentally Destroying Company Goods 
6203 Using Company Phone to Make Long-Distance Personal Calls 
6204 Using Company Phone to Make Long-Distance Personal Calls to Sell Stolen
Company Goods 
6205 Hiding from Boss 
6206 Gossip 
6207 Planning a Social Event (e.g. vacation, wedding, etc.) 
6210 Feeling Sorry For Yourself 
6211 Updating Resume 
6212 Faxing Resume to Another Employer/Headhunter 
6213 Out of Office on Interview 
6221 Pretending to Work While Boss Is Watching 
6222 Pretending to Enjoy Your Job 
6223 Pretending You Like Coworker 
6224 Pretending You Like Important People When in Reality They are Jerks 
6238 Miscellaneous Unproductive Fantasizing 
6350 Playing Pranks on the New Guy/Girl 
6601 Running your own Business on Company Time (See Code #6603) 
6602 Complaining 
6603 Writing a Book on Company Time 
6611 Staring Into Space 
6612 Staring At Computer Screen 
6615 Transcendental Meditation 
7281 Extended Visit to the Bathroom (at least 10 minutes) 
7400 Talking With Divorce Lawyer on Phone 
7401 Talking With Plumber on Phone 
7402 Talking With Dentist on Phone 
7403 Talking With Doctor on Phone 
7404 Talking With Masseuse on Phone 
7405 Talking With House Painter on Phone 
7406 Talking With Personal Therapist on Phone 
7419 Talking With Miscellaneous Paid Professional on Phone 
7425 Talking With Mistress/Boy-Toy on Phone 
7931 Asking Coworker to Aid You in an Illicit Activity 
8000 Recreational Drug Use 
8001 Non-recreational Drug Use 
8002 Liquid Lunch 
8100 
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